Minister Merlin's Twelve Fail Safe Chat Up Lines.

[magog_83]

Present for jelazakazone who asked to see Minister Merlin's top secret 'Chat Up Lines for Arthur Future Reference', carefully recorded in his Jotter To Jog The Memory and discovered and mocked by several of his friends ;)

Set in my Meeting the Minister verse, naturally.

This was a collaborative process between myself and a8c_sock, and by 'collaborative' I mean she came up with the cheesiest lines and I laughed myself silly and added annotations :D :D :D

TOP SECRET. DO NOT READ ON PAIN OF A BAT BOGEY HEX.
LIST OF CHAT UP LINES FOR ARTHUR FUTURE REFERENCE.

Can I buy you a Butterbeer Muggle beverage?

I like your hair, what potion do you use? (Note to self: Find out what potions Muggles use) (Note from Ron: This is really lame)

How about you and I make some magic together. (Note to Self: Explain that only you will be able to make magic, but Arthur the other person can watch)

If I had to be under a spell, I’d like to be under yours. (Note from Ron: LAME)

I think someone’s charmed my eyes, I can’t stop looking at you. (Note from Ron: STOP IT)

If I had a time turner I’d go back and meet you all over again (Note to self: the second time, not the time when he fainted and hit his head).

If I stood in front of the mirror of Erised, all I’d see is you (Note to self: add mirror of Erised to the handbook, maybe with a diagram)

You have accioed my heart. (Note to self: tell Arthur relevant persons this isn’t real).

If this were the game of Quidditch, I’d be the Quaffle and you’d be the hoop (Note to self: amend to muggle cricket. I'll be the stump).

There’s something wrong with my owl, it doesn’t have your address. (Note from Ron: that’s not the only thing wrong with your owl) Shut up, Archimedes just gets confused sometimes. It was a very clean window.

Mind if I watch you work? Your Charms are outstanding (Note to self: Find equivalent Muggle activity) (Note from Gwaine: How about interpretive dance?)

Do you want to see my wand? (Note from Hermione: Don’t use this. Ever. And stop taking suggestions from Gwaine. In fact, stop this altogether please).

Comments

[a8c-sock.livejournal.com]

I AM UNREPENTANT WHEN IT COMES TO CHEESY MAGICAL CHAT UP LINES.

I have enjoyed myself. Your annotations make them work :D

I am sure Minister Merlin would be successful. Well when Arthur worked out what he was on about ;-)

[katie-andrew.livejournal.com]

:D I love the little additions to this 'verse.

Hahaha, "I'll be the stump." Oh, Merlin. I do so love you.

[magog-83.livejournal.com]

He'd make an adorable stump. Although I don't think he's worked out yet that his job in the extended metaphor would be to get hit by the balls... God knows what Arthur gets to be.

[katie-andrew.livejournal.com]

I'm giggling like a child at Merlin's job description. :P

[blondielox.livejournal.com]

XD I love how these go from sort of acceptable to downright ridiculous.

ARCHIMEDES!! I ♥ him in The Sword in the Stone. The Disney film doesn't do him justice...

Goddammit Hermione why have you always gotta be such a buzzkill?? Also: what potion does Gwaine use???

[magog-83.livejournal.com]

L'Oreal. Because he's worth it ;)

[giecast.livejournal.com]

Sorry to jump in, but...Hugh Laurie and L'Oreal!! I giggled myself silly watching that vid. =DD

[sabriel75.livejournal.com]

LOL!

[jelazakazone.livejournal.com]

Aw, you are awesome! This totally made me laugh. Oh, the cheese. Hilarious. I can't pick a favorite; truly, they are all great. And the added little notes are wonderful:D

[capricornucopia.livejournal.com]

The more in love Merlin is, the more ridiculous he gets. :D

[cat-77.livejournal.com]

Hee! Awesome!

[archaeologist-d.livejournal.com]

with those pickup lines, Merlin will be single forever.

[lrndng.livejournal.com]

HAHAHA

omg all these lines are quotable!!

[aleluna187.livejournal.com]

Do you want to see my wand?

hahahaha oh Merlin ;D I do, ehm..

Very funny &hearts

[kittie8571.livejournal.com]

these are just too adorable! I love this verse.

[aprileaf.livejournal.com]

Muggle beverage hee! I love the little additions to this 'verse!! This one had me laughing in several spots. :D

And actually, I sort of went 'awwwwwww' at the Mirror of Erised one. If said in the right tone, it could be really earnest and sweet.

[dk323.livejournal.com]

Shut up, Archimedes just gets confused sometimes. It was a very clean window.

I loled at this bit. :p

The Erised one is sweet -- aww. ♥ I enjoyed reading this. :)

[thismaz.livejournal.com]

Can I vote with Ron? *g*
It was a very clean window. *bg*
interpretive dance? Gwaine is being mischievous, I fear.

[gomusing.livejournal.com]

lmao Merlin. I think Arthur's just going to look at him fondly while he tries them all.

[giecast.livejournal.com]

Oooh the cheesiness! I can imagine Merlin saying these lines and Arthur facepalming while secretly feeling pleased that he's being chatted up. Hermione should just sit back and enjoy the show since, clearly, Merlin can't be stopped.

Awww Archimedes, I feel your pain! It's easy to be confused by very clean windows ok. It happens to me a lot with those glass doors.

[bryonyashley.livejournal.com]

LOL That was so funny! :D Oh Ron..i totally ♥ you. *g*

[chocolate-and-i.livejournal.com]

So giggle worthy! All your gems in this verse are.
Please continue<3

[ladililn.livejournal.com]

My favorite has got to be the Mirror of Erised one. Oh Merlin. He tries so hard. ♥

[tama_abi]

I'm laughing myself silly in front of this...

I shall there declare (again) my undying love for you and... ask you for more? *_*

Thank you!!!

[helva2260.livejournal.com]

Hee! I love this list (and the annotations)!

...PS, was this (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cumbria-14111152) Archimedes by any chance? ;D

[zedabbler.livejournal.com]

This is so entertaining! I've enjoyed it very much. Thanks for writing it~

[dark-samira.livejournal.com]

"add mirror of Erised to the handbook, maybe with a diagram"
this made me laugh out loud :)

[kassandrastoker.livejournal.com]

Merlin, you adorable little magic you.

You should take notes from Draco, he's got alota sexy lines :))


I love your work! :))